How To Bring Back Intimacy In A Marriage?

Introduction

Couples must maintain intimate behaviors within their marriage, however, such as due to working, pressures, and troubles within the marriage, this is not always possible. But, it is important to pay close attention to intimacy as it helps the spouses maintain physical and emotional attachment. This article shows how two people can create passion and intimacy back into relationships through communication, careful approaches, and purposeful strategies. In this article, the ten effective strategies that married couples can employ to reignite passion in their relationships will be discussed based on research and professional opinions.

The Disruption of Intimacy and Its Effects on Connection

Whenever people have sex less frequently, they are bound to pick a few cues of separation, frustrations, and animosity. A survey conducted by Marriage.com in 2017 shows that 56% of married couples desire better intimacy in their marriage, the Association of Marriage and Family Therapists revealed that the primary cause of low intimate time is the poor quality time invested. However, the good news is that there is hope that through purposeful work couples can and can get their bond back and passion revitalized.

1. Make Time for Romance

The most rampant intimacy destroyer is when a schedule is so tight that there is no time for the partners. Restoring a romantic relationship needs effort. This should be done by fixing dates to spend time together as a couple, ensuring couple time is given much value, and avoiding many interruptions. Here are some ideas:

• Sit close while watching the television programs you love without having to use your phone.
• Prepare a meal together in the evening and eat this meal with the lights off and candles instead of lightning.
• Take long walks together and try to walk with your hand in yours.
• Kiss and hug without a reason, as often as you can during the day.

Today the world’s most renowned relationship scientist, Dr. John Gottman, says that everything that you do in your partnership is sex preparation. Plan these intimate moments to happen every week and make each other adhere to the plan.

2. Foster Emotional Intimacy

It will also be necessary to note that a good sexual relationship implies a good emotional relationship as well. When trying to bolster the physical aspect of your relationship, start with the affectional level. This involves:

• Exposing your needs in the relationship in a polite way.
• Being able to look into your partner’s eyes during an argument without getting angry or being angry yourself.
• Expressing positive needs instead of complaints or criticism.

According to Dr. Gottman, one way of maintaining relationship quality is through the concept known as emotional investment or emotional connectedness. For instance, instead of saying:- ‘You never think about me’ say – ‘I would like to spend more time thinking about us.’ This shift contributes to developing intimacy to the relations.

3. Rekindle Your Physical Intimacy.

If performance anxiety becomes an issue, trying to shift the expectation away from it and apply itself to small foreplay touches is a good way to open communication between partners. Reconnect physically in a low-pressure, romantic way by:

• The sort which is meant for relaxation, where you just touch the body lightly with your hands.
• Use of a common shower and rubbing each other down.
• Slow dancing with your partner in the living room.
• Writing love messages and placing them in places that the partner will find them, like under the pillow or waking up to a cup of coffee or flowers.

Sharing with hands by holding hands or hugging, as well as tender touching that is habitual, increases oxytocin, the bonding hormone that works in reigniting passion at appropriate intervals. All these small steps create a path towards further physical contact.

4. Allow Tension to Build

Expectation enhances enjoyment, and keeping things a little close to the chest can add something to experiences. Focus on:

• Savoring each stage of the foreplay allows one to savor the other type of foreplay.
• To cultivate desire one presents fantasies or teases.
• Switching venues for sexual activity to make it new.
• Burning candles and bringing some love songs in the background to make her feel wanted, loved, and appreciated.

It has been found, scientifically, that our brains have more pleasure in the event when there is an anticipation towards the reward. Take this in your favor and ensure that you take your time in doing everything.

5. Communicate Openly About Intimacy

Men and women also stop sharing what they want, what they require, and how they feel, thus a failure in communication occurs. To strengthen your connection:

• Explain how the two of you feel intimacy at profound degrees.
• Let someone know what you consider as intimacy nurturing and this would entail serving the partner, verbally affirming him/her or even reaching out to him/her.
• Everything needs to be addressed without stigma; just try to fill the needs together.
• Particularly, let people discuss the things they like or do not like about the sexual activity and preferences in the bedroom.

According to Dr. Gottman, when people positively speak about their needs (For example stating ‘I like when you embrace me like this’) people become connected and there can be no talk of criticism.

6. Focus on Affectionate Touch

Love and desire can also be built by other ways of touch not sexual in nature. This includes:

• Holding hands often.
• Kissing hello and goodbye.
• Cuddling or touching limbs such as a handshake, pat on the back, embrace for a long period, etc.
• Tell your partner that you enjoy being with him or her.

These results reveal that affectionate touch decreases cortisol, the stress hormone while enhancing relationship satisfaction. American romanticist Hawthorne has maintained that even the small daily signals are sufficient enough to build the context for passion.

7. Practice Emotional Vulnerability

Being open about your innermost desires, fantasies, and fears builds trust and intimacy. While it may feel uncomfortable at first, practicing vulnerability strengthens your bond. Consider:

• Sharing your feelings without fear of judgment.
• Talking about your hopes and dreams for the relationship.
• Exploring ways to bring more spontaneity and excitement into your intimate life.

If emotional intimacy feels difficult, individual or couples therapy can provide guidance.

8. Find the joy in Life and Share the Laughter all Together

Humor and fun produce chemicals in the body that give you a healthy glow, which your partner finds appealing. Incorporate fun into your relationship by:

• it is possible to come up with inside jokes or even give the animals ridiculous names.
• Having small dance events in your living room, for instance.
• Doing fun activities, but in a competitive way.
• Holding hands, watching comedies or similar, meming about past joyful moments that you have spent together.

Why do you need to have fun together? When you’re having fun, you are on the same page, and you can face life together, and re-ignite that passion as a couple.

9. Vary Your Intimate Experiences

Habits over time can lose the passion so try new ways to connect. Try:

• Specific activity: Trying various forms of contact (soft, loving, sexual, or playful).
• Operations of elements such as surprise dates or weekend trips.
• Introducing either a dream or a new concept into your lover’s intimacy.

Married people who ask questions to each other most of the time tend to have profound relationships.

10. Seek Professional Guidance if Needed

• If you fail to get good results from the efforts, you are making, then there is nothing wrong with approaching a marriage counselor. A professional can:
• Find out the factors that may cause a lack of intimacy in your relationship.
• Possess resources that will help to restore communication and build trust.
• Offer ideas for affection-and-closeness-building activities.

Remember that only a true and sincere commitment to change will put you in a position where you think you need help. With the right direction, most couples see the spark that they were sure was dead and buried.

Final Thoughts

Lovemaking in marriage can be an effort and sometimes couples have to be attentive and even inventive but the pay as they say is enormous. The key to recommitted affection entails recall of the fundamentals of affection, this includes; emotional connection, groping, and time for the romance of the relationship. No matter how little it may be, a subtle offering of support, having a productive discussion, or seeking help professionally- you may find the happiness that led to the bond you have today.