Introduction
Of course, it’s a bit awkward in a relationship to get compliments—especially if you’ve never gotten them. Still, nice feelings associated with receiving them gracelessly versus dismissively build an attachment within the context of romance, and it’s actually a generally excellent social custom to overapply in interactions with others, whether flirting or not. What comes next is a guide that displays ways to answer the compliments received from your partner.
Compliment Response Statistics
| Response Type | Resulting Impact on Relationship |
| Deflecting or denying the compliment | Can make your partner feel unappreciated or discourage future compliments |
| Overly enthusiastic or exaggerated response | It may come across as disingenuous or fishing for more compliments |
| Giving a compliment in return | Shows appreciation and fosters reciprocity in the relationship |
| Saying “Thank you” sincerely | Simple yet powerful acknowledgement of your partner’s sentiment |
Why Proper Compliment Response Matters
Receiving compliments may feel embarrassing, but responding to them respectfully is important for building intimacy and trust in a romantic relationship. Some key reasons why learning how to reply to compliments matters include properly:
- It should make your partner feel you value their feelings. Through the rejection or failure to accept a compliment, you can be seen as ungrateful and hurting them. Responding respectfully should validate their sentiment.
- It promotes more compliments. More motivation for a person to keep complimenting you in the future arises if your partner feels appreciated for your response. Positive feelings are developed by both sides.
- It strengthens emotional connection: Exchanging compliments and reacting to them with respect enables the two partners to express affection and admiration towards one another.
- Apparently, it is a relational skill. Likewise,, to other social skills, accepting compliments gracefully increases how one can effectively interact with the other half and, therefore, keep the intimacy alive.
- It boosts your partner’s self-esteem: With genuine and thoughtful responses, the giver of a compliment will know you appreciate their viewing you positively. This has a positive impact on them, too.
With practice, you’ll learn to respond naturally in a way that expresses gratitude and keeps the compliment conversation flowing positively between you.
Common Compliment Response Mistakes
Before looking at better response options, it’s helpful to identify some typical mistakes or ineffective responses people often give:
- Discounting or dismissing the compliment: Responses like “No, I’m not” or “Okay, you’re just exaggerating” undermine those supportive words.
- Deflection: It consists of continuing to the next subject too fast to digest what was said.
- Self-insulting jokes: Obviously, humor is one thing, but in reaction to an honest compliment, joking usually serves to do the compliment a disservice and deprive it of its sincerity.
- Rhapsodizing: Saying, “Oh, thank you so much. Oh, I can now go to heaven” might have quite the opposite effect you might have desired.
- Focused only on physical appearance: If someone says you are smart or well-behaved enough, don’t take it as a hint to fixate only on your physical appearance.
- Demanding more compliments: Responding in a way that shows you’re asking for more flattery is a complete put-off.
Avoiding these pitfall responses and learning more affirmative techniques helps your partner feel appreciated for their thoughtfulness.
Effective Compliment Response Strategies
Here are some recommended strategies for responding well when your partner pays you a compliment in the relationship:
- Say Thank You
A simple yet sincere “Thank you” is often the best response and cannot really be faulted. It directly acknowledges their kind words with grace and gratitude. You can also smile warmly when saying thanks to make it more heartfelt.
- Provide a Brief Explanation
If a compliment catches you off guard, you can explain your reaction briefly before saying thank you. For example, “Aww, that’s really sweet of you to say. I wasn’t expecting that compliment, so thank you!” Keep it short so the focus remains on their sentiment.
- Compliment Them Back
Responding to a compliment by also complimenting your partner in return is a nourishing way to continue the compliment exchange. Say something you genuinely appreciate about them to foster reciprocity, e.g. “Thank you, you look so handsome today too.”
- Ask for Clarification
If unsure how to reply, you can ask them to elaborate, e.g. “That’s kind of you, what makes you say that?” Engaging politely conveys interest versus dismissing the compliment out of hand.
- Reference a Specific Trait
If the compliment pertains to one of your qualities or gifts, acknowledge that trait specifically before thanking them. For instance, “Aww, thanks for noticing how hard I work. I really appreciate you saying that.”
- Show Modest Appreciation
Acknowledging the compliment humbly without false modesty is preferable over unnecessary deflection. Say something like, “You always know how to make me feel special. I’m flattered, thank you.”
- Smile or Make Eye Contact
Non-verbal cues like smiling warmly, holding eye contact briefly or giving them a quick hug/kiss can also help sincerely convey your appreciation for the compliment beyond just words.
Maintaining the Compliment Conversation
Once you’ve thanked your partner for their kind words, consider ways to keep the compliment dialogue going in a natural, positive manner:
- Ask them what made them say that to learn their perspective
- Say something specific you really appreciate about them in return
- Talk about a memory related to the compliment that pops into your head, being happy about it
- Ask about their day or interests to transition topics smoothly
- Show affection, such as holding hands while you’re talking
You will soon feel more comfortable in the flow of easily receiving compliments while nourishing an uplifting exchange between you and your loved one with much practice. The key to this is responding respectfully without dismissiveness.
Dealing with Unexpected Compliments
At times, your partner may compliment you out of the blue for something you weren’t prepared for. In such scenarios:
- Primarily, keep your surprise brief but express gratitude
- Ask for time to digest it if taken by real surprise
- Do ensure that you will think positively about it rather than flatly refusing/doubting it
- Try avoiding overthinking their intentions at the time
- Respond with appreciation of the kind thought more than anything else
As one learns to respond graciously, it becomes easy to acknowledge compliments, whether unexpected or otherwise. Your partner would like to show some love towards you.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q. What if I don’t feel I deserve the compliment?
A. Do not negate or discredit the comment. You can respect your partner’s viewpoint and thank them for it, while inside, you make a decision on where to take action. A compliment is a grace; graciously receive it.
Q. What if I think my partner is buttering me up?
A. Accept compliments at face value as caring gestures Unless you have reason not to trust them. Questioning true motives risks undermining the relationship unnecessarily.
Q. Is ok to genuinely disagree with a compliment?
A. You may discord politely by thanking them for their view and then mention that your self-assessment differs without putting yourself down. Focus on appreciation of good intentions on their part.
Q. Do I always have to compliment back right away?
A. No, though, do return in kind after some time so that they know their efforts were recognized and appreciated. You don’t need to right then, but returning a favor leads to closer relationships all around.
Q. How do I respond if someone gives me an inappropriate compliment?
A. Be polite but uncomfortable, clearly indicating that inappropriate comments are not going to be tolerated or invited. If necessary, draw boundaries clearly but respectfully to draw a line on what may be acceptable.
Conclusion
Learning to receive and reply to compliments graciously is an important relationship skill. With practice handling compliments respectfully through thanking sincerely, reciprocating affection, engaging thoughtfully, and focusing on your partner’s good intentions, you nurture intimacy even in small moments. Compliments are opportunities to express and receive care. By responding properly, you cultivate closeness and help your loved one feel appreciated for boosting your spirit with their kind words.