Introduction
Marriage must include romance. It ensures a bonfire in your relationship with your wife. Even though time and routine may gradually erode romantic tendencies in life, if you have been too busy with work to spend time together or would like to know how to surprise her, this article is for you.
The following are some ideas on being more romantic with your wife. This will help you understand small, regular acts and big surprises that will go a long way in creating a stronger bond between you and making her feel really cherished.
Listen to Her and Notice the Little Things
![Listen to Her and Notice the Little Things](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/Listen-to-Her-and-Notice-the-Little-Things.webp)
One of the most important aspects of romance is making your wife feel truly seen and heard. Try to listen to her when you talk – without distractions from your phone, TV, or computer. Pay attention to the little details she shares about her day, thoughts, or feelings.
Also, pay attention to and appreciate little things about her – maybe she has adjusted her hair or worn a different dress. Compliment her when she does something that reminds you why you love her, such as laughing at something hilarious or having a loving talk with your children. These tiny things go unnoticed by many people, but they can mean the world to her, especially if you let her know that you realize them.
Leave Unexpected Love Notes
An easy way to spark romance is to leave sweet notes for your wife to find unexpectedly throughout her day. You can hide them in her purse, tuck one under her pillow, or stick sticky notes inside the refrigerator or cabinets. Keep the love notes short but thoughtful – maybe include an inside joke, a lyric from one of her favorite songs, or something you love about her.
Having these sweet surprises pop up unexpectedly will make your wife feel cared for. It also shows that you took the time and tried to plan something for her.
Give Small Tokens of Affection
Gift giving doesn’t have to be only on special occasions. Surprise your wife with little tokens of affection simply because you were thinking of her. Bring home her favorite treat from the bakery, pick up a new nail polish color you think she’d like, grab the novel she mentioned wanting to read, or get tickets to see a band or artist she loves.
These small but thoughtful gifts tell your wife she’s always on your mind and that you know and care about her interests. The gifts themselves don’t have to be expensive – it truly is the gesture that counts.
Recreate Special Memories
![surprise your wife
Recreate Special Memories](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/surprise-your-wife.webp)
Think back on special memories you and your wife share, whether it was a certain vacation spot, a restaurant where you had a memorable date, or even just a quiet evening at home together. Recreate parts of these special memories to remind your wife of their meaning.
For example, surprise your wife by packing a romantic stargazing picnic if you went stargazing together on an early dating trip. Or, take her on a date to that restaurant from your engagement or honeymoon. Other ideas are to pick up her favorite snack from back then or add her old favorite song to a playlist. These nostalgia-inspired gestures show how much the time with your wife means to you.
Plan Regular Date Nights
Busy schedules, kids, and stress can take away your time with your wife. That’s why it’s necessary to schedule regular dates where the focus is on romance – just between you two. It doesn’t matter what you do during these evenings as long as you spend your moments there exclusively discussing with each other.
Go to dinner and actually talk without distraction. Try a new activity like an art class or ballroom dancing. Or, keep it simple with wine and a movie in. No matter what, date nights ensure guaranteed meaningful time together. Don’t let them fall off the calendar!
Give Random Hugs and Kisses
One of the most romantic ways to treat your wife is to be spontaneously affectionate. Don’t hold kisses and hugs for hellos and goodbyes only; make them part of your day together.
Really look at her and let yourself fall in love with her all over again. Pull her into a deep kiss and say I love you. Besides, enter from behind when she cooks or tidies up and wrap her close to you. Cuddle up when reading or watching TV together on the couch. All this physical touch strengthens your emotional closeness.
Take an Impromptu Trip
![Take an Impromptu Trip](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/Take-an-Impromptu-Trip.webp)
Whisk your wife away on an impromptu romantic trip! The element of surprise adds excitement and adventure. Plus, the focus will be completely on your relationship without the usual day-to-day responsibilities getting in the way.
Your getaway could be an overnighter or a weekend trip. This might entail renting a cozy cabin in the mountains, a wine-tasting tour, or booking a night at a fancy hotel across town. The whole point is that wherever one may go, it should be an opportunity for quality time spent individually, discovering new things together, and coming together emotionally & sexually again.
Make Intimacy a Priority
One mistake couples often make as the years go by is letting their sex life and intimacy fade away. Make keeping your physical connection strong a priority by setting aside time to be intimate. Flirt throughout the day via texts or notes to get excitement brewing. Or, send each other playful signals when it’s time for intimacy, like lighting certain candles.
Trying new things together and talking openly about your desires keeps intimacy fresh and passionate. It ensures this vital part of your marriage thrives instead of becoming routine or non-existent over time.
Have a Regular Movie Night In
![Have a Regular Movie Night In](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/How-Can-I-Be-Romantic-to-My-Wife-1.webp)
It doesn’t have to be fancy, but set aside at least one night a week for just the two of you to cuddle up and enjoy a movie. Make your movie night consistent – maybe Friday or Saturday evening every week. Stock up on your wife’s favorite snacks beforehand. Once it becomes a habit, movie night gives you both something to look forward to.
Use this time to unplug from outside distractions and the week’s stresses. Laugh together over a comedy. Cuddle close during a romantic film. Or, talk through something more serious. No matter the movie, it’s about prioritizing quality bonding.
Cook Dinner Together
Instead of you or your wife tackling another solo dinner duty, cook together! Pour each other glasses of wine and play some music as you chop, sauté, bake, and laugh your way through a new recipe. Cooking together builds teamwork and lets you reconnect during an otherwise mundane chore.
If schedules are too hectic for elaborate meals, even making a simple breakfast, lunch, or dessert together works. Set a goal with your wife to try one new recipe every week or every month. Not only will you expand your taste horizons, but you’ll enjoy the simple pleasure of creating something yummy shoulder-to-shoulder.
Always Say ‘I Love You’
This may seem obvious, but consistently telling your wife, “I love you,” out loud is hugely important. It reassures her of your devotion. Make it the last thing you say before leaving the house and returning home. Whisper it in her ear as you drift off to sleep. Shout it proudly in a dedication to a love song. Send a flirty text that says, “I love you!”
You may feel like your actions surely prove your love – and they do. But hearing those three little words still means the world. Don’t let saying “I love you” become casual or robotic. Make eye contact and truly feel the weight of each word when you say it.
Learn Her Love Languages
![Learn Her Love Languages](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/Learn-Her-Love-Languages.webp)
People give and receive love differently, categorized into “love languages.” Learn what makes your wife feel most loved – thoughtful gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, or physical touch. Once you identify her main love languages, tailor your romantic gestures to those.
For example, sets aside an hour to cook her favorite meal if acts of service is her language. Or, write a long love letter if she craves words of affirmation. Your efforts won’t go unappreciated when you purposefully appeal to how she best receives love. She’ll truly feel special.
Surprise Her with a Romantic Getaway
Pack your wife’s bags for an upcoming weekend and keep the destination a surprise for added excitement. Give her subtle packing tips like suggesting casual clothes or a swimsuit without giving anything away. At the end of a long week, when she least expects it, sweep her away to a romantic hotel, resort, or different city.
Ideally, scope out the destination ahead of time. Look for weekend packages that include accommodations, meals, couples massages or activities all bundled together to make planning easy. That way, your wife can relax as you whisk her off on a stress-free romantic adventure.
Ask Open-Ended Questions
It’s easy for couples to get stuck in basic surface-level conversations about the weather, chores, work, and kids. While those things are important, too much of that small talk can feel boring and disconnect you. Asking open-ended questions prompts deeper discussions and insights into each other’s thoughts, feelings, and perspectives.
For example, instead of “How was your day?” try “What made you smile today?” or “Did you learn anything new/interesting today?
Have Regular Dance Parties
Dancing together creates flirty, playful energy between you and your wife. During a busy week, it can be hard to find the time, but make it a point to have regular dance parties – even if it’s just the two of you!
Ten minutes before dinner, put on an upbeat playlist. Or, have an impromptu living room dance party during chores. Sneak in a slow dance while your favorite love song comes on the radio. Let yourselves be silly, have fun, and break away from the stresses of everyday responsibilities. Moving your body to music is cathartic. It also releases feel-good endorphins that boost your intimacy and connection.
Take a Walk Together
![Take a Walk Together](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/Take-a-Walk-Together.webp)
Steal away for regular walks with your wife, holding hands and giving your undivided attention to each other. A relaxing stroll through your neighborhood or a nearby park gives you built-in one-on-one time away from TV, devices, and other distractions.
As you walk, engage in meaningful talk about goals, dreams, happy memories, or anything on your mind. Or, enjoy companionable silence soaking up nature and each other’s presence. Make walks together, just the two of you, a new ritual whenever you can.
Write an Old-Fashioned Love Letter
In today’s digital age, sitting down to write a heartfelt, handwritten love letter is truly a romantic gift. The time and care it takes to craft a letter adds meaning and thoughtfulness. Plus, your wife can read your intimate words again and again whenever she wants.
Pour your heart out on fancy stationery or a simple notebook page. Tell your wife what you admire most about her, why you’re grateful, she’s your wife, and your dreams together. Reference inside jokes or special memories only the two of you share. Seal your letter in an envelope addressed to her like you would have when you were dating.
Surprise Breakfast in Bed
One of the most classic romantic gestures that never gets old is breakfast in bed. Make your wife’s breakfast favorites on a free morning or lazy weekend. Think waffles, fresh fruit, her preferred morning beverage, and maybe even a flower in a vase. Carefully arrange everything on a tray that you can bring upstairs.
Gently wake your wife with kisses or her favorite song. Let her relax in bed while you present the tray. Make this about pampering and quality time, not just the food itself. Feed each other bites in between flirty conversations. The whole experience says “I love you” in a deliciously cozy way.
Recreate Your First Date
![Recreate Your First Date](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/Recreate-Your-First-Date.webp)
Recreate parts of your first date with your wife for nostalgic romance. Did you go mini golfing? Eat at a certain restaurant? Catch a movie? Go back and relive highlights from when your relationship was new.
As you reminisce over your first date together, you’ll laugh over memories you may have forgotten. It also creates space to reflect on how far your connection has come. Even small throwback elements – like ordering the same drink she did back then or putting on the same cologne – add playfulness. This thoughtful trip down memory lane strengthens your bond.
Write Love Notes on the Mirror
Use dry-erase markers to leave romantic or encouraging notes on the bathroom mirror for your wife. That way, she sees them when she gets ready in the morning to start her day – maybe a cute rhyme that says, “I love you so much” or “You are beautiful.”
You can also use the mirror for naughtier notes conveying your attraction to her. The possibilities are endless! Use markers that wipe off easily so she finds fresh notes all week. Seeing your words reflected back adds a magical element.
Do Her Chores
Take something tedious off your wife’s long to-do list by doing that chore yourself as a loving act of service. Maybe you tackle the mountain of laundry or deep clean the bathrooms. Or, run kid duty all afternoon while your wife enjoys a long, quiet bubble bath.
Pay attention to household tasks she dislikes, or that normally fall to her by default. Then, do them without being asked. It could be as simple as making the bed daily or packing the kids’ lunches to spare her the hassle. She will feel so cared for.
Make Dinner Together by Candlelight
![Make Dinner Together by Candlelight](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/Make-Dinner-Together-by-Candlelight.webp)
Light some candles and soft music to transform an ordinary night of making dinner into romantic couple time. Open a bottle of wine to sip while you cook a yummy meal together from scratch – maybe something complicated you’ve never tried before.
Linger at the table, feeding each other bites of food and flirting over candlelight once everything is ready. The candles provide a warm, cozy, intimate, and uniquely special glow. Soak up this quality time connecting over something you made together.
Record a Love Song for Her
Channel your inner singer-songwriter. Write lyrics expressing why you love your wife or how much she means to you, record yourself singing them, then give them to her like a love letter she can replay anytime.
You don’t have to be a professional singer; the production quality doesn’t matter. She’ll adore the sweet, personal touch of hearing your voice croon original declarations of love just for her. Up the romance by getting out your guitar or keyboard and performing live for an intimate private concert.
Take Painting Classes
Doing any activity for the first time sparks excitement, playfulness, and bonding. Take couples painting classes to try something creative you’ve never done before. Over a few glasses of wine, an instructor guides you step-by-step through reproducing beautiful nature scenes, animals, buildings, flowers, or more abstract designs onto blank canvases.
You get to relax, color outside the lines, and have light-hearted fun seeing each other’s artwork take shape. It doesn’t matter how skilled you are – creating art together is intimate. Plus, you get to take home a reminder of your romantic night.
Gaze at the Stars
![Gaze at the Stars](https://verywellmindset.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/Gaze-at-the-Stars.webp)
On clear nights, spread out a cozy blanket in your backyard or nearest park to stargaze together. Escape light pollution for optimal star-spotting. Cuddle close for warmth and download a night sky app to help spot constellations. As you take in the vast beauty overhead, you can talk about dreams, the grandeur and mysteries of the universe, what different futures you imagine, or just blissfully enjoy the silence.
Point out shooting stars and make wishes together. This simple, affordable date has timeless romantic appeal, perfect for feeling tiny yet connected as part of something wondrous and bigger than yourselves.
Make Home Feel Like a Hotel
Transform your home into a romantic hotel-style oasis just for your wife to pamper and indulge her. Start in the bedroom, lighting candles and scattering rose petals across crisp hotel-like bedding. Leave a new fancy silk robe for her to relax in. Arrange an in-room spa basket with lotions, masks, bath bombs, scented candles for a long soak, and wine glasses with her favorite bottle of vino.
In the kitchen, whip up a charcuterie board overflowing with upscale cheeses, fruit, cured meats, and crackers. Deliver room service straight to bed on a silver platter. Treat her exactly as she deserves – like a queen.
Conclusion
- Marriage must include romance to keep the relationship strong and exciting.
- Listening to your wife, leaving love notes, giving small tokens of affection, and recreating special memories are all ways to be more romantic.
- Planning regular date nights, giving random hugs and kisses, and taking impromptu trips can help keep the romance alive.
- Making intimacy a priority, having movie nights in, cooking dinner together, and always saying ‘I love you’ are essential for a strong relationship.
- Learning your wife’s love languages, surprising her with getaways, asking open-ended questions, and having dance parties can deepen your connection.
- Walking together, writing love letters, serving breakfast in bed, and recreating your first date are all ways to show your love and appreciation.